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Your profile name is up there with a chatroom handle. The easiest way to get noticed, though, is to find your 'Grindr name', inspired by the charming men who call themselves "Butt_Cleaner" or "Nuts_Gobbler" (seriously - it's 'a thing').An Ok Cupid username, for instance, is impossible to miss.

It will appear alongside your picture and could mean all the difference between someone giving a saucy smile and clicking on you to find out more or eliciting merely an eye roll before they scroll on to the next sweetly monikered singleton. They were, to me, the pseudonym equivalent of a cheesy pickup line.Much more appealing were earnest self-depictions or vague, consciously nonsensical noun mish-mashes.I don’t attribute this to an alignment of stars, to the mercy of the web gods and goddesses, or even to OKC’s algorithm, which supposedly uses questions such as “What’s worse, book burning or flag burning? Instead, I chalk up my positive online dating experiences -- which, with the exception of a brazen date who rudely shushed fellow theatergoers (referred to amongst my friends henceforth as “the shusher”), has been without horror stories -- to my careful evaluation of a potential match’s username before arranging a date.

Puns and hyper-masculine references were mostly no-gos.

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