Introverts recharge when they are by themselves, and prefer less external stimulation.
Extroverts recharge by being around others and prefer more external stimulation. More than likely, you are introverted, to some extent.
This creates a delicate balance where each person finds pleasure in the other’s company, whereas they are not competing for one another’s attention.
Of further interest is how Extraverts and Introverts tend to adapt at the start of a new relationship, taking on the qualities of one another in order to scale back the extremes of their personalities.
If you’re still unsure, answer these simple yes or no questions:– Do people tell me that I’m a good listener? – Do people often describe me as easygoing or mellow?
– Do I prefer one-on-one conversations to large group conversations? If you answered “yes” to most of these questions, you likely have a strong introvert side to you.
Josh quickly learned that I don’t unwind by participating in small talk.
He has a look he gives back that says he acknowledges my request to leave. As with my shopping example, I’ll go browse the aisles while I’m waiting for him to finish. Being married is far different from dating in that when I need alone time, I can’t just say goodbye to Josh and go home. As someone who appreciates space, it was an adjustment always having someone around.
Last week, I wrote about some of the ways introverts can build community.
This week, I want to focus on how introverts can operate in relationships with people who are more extroverted.
In western society, we live in a very extrovert-biased world.
That is to say, people are rewarded on their sociability and ability to appear extroverted and boisterous.
Or if we’re on Skype at home, I’ll leave the room when I get tired and go do something else. As an introvert, I had to learn to be alone with someone else.